Moms Fuck, Too.

“Family-friendly, one-piece swimsuits."

Last month, I watched a bunch of TikTok swimsuit hauls in anticipation of my family vacation. I wanted to see bikinis, but the algorithm had other ideas. Because I’m a mom, the results were all one-piece swimsuits dubbed “family-friendly”, as if having a child revoked my right to a cheeky fit.

My stomach, cleavage, booty cheeks, and upper thighs are the casualties of motherhood. While my husband has worn the same butt crack-skimming swim shorts since he was 25, I’ve been expected to reinvent myself as a wholesome, sexually-devoid mom–poolside and beyond.

Trust me–and Pornhub–when I say that people LIKE to fuck moms. “MILF” was the most popular category on Pornhub last year.

But the idea that mom herself might want to fuck? Might ask to be spanked, talk dirty, or bring a third into bed? Please. We’re still scandalized by their belly buttons.

Bikinis are hardly the gravest matter in motherhood (if pressed, I’d say it’s something like unaffordable childcare, wage gaps, maternal health disparities among Black women, and impossible “perfect mom standards”). And not every mom–or person–wants to have sex.

But I know there’s a mom at brunch right now, wearing her appropriately modest Old Navy dress, who’s grieving the time when Sunday mornings were for rehashing wild stories of the night before.

And to her, we say: you get to be whoever you want. You don’t have to choose between daycare and aftercare. You can be maternal and MILFy, modest and moaning. 

Because moms fuck, too.

-Jenn